a big RELIEF?

Perhaps I ought to sigh and smile and feel relieved.
But I’m feeling a little LOST instead.
I was released as Relief Society President on Sunday.
I was sustained on September 25, 2011.
Released on October 14, 2012.
Just over a year.
Probably the hardest year of my life.

I’m still alive.
All the tots are still alive.
It’s really a miracle.

Oh – how I’ve grown.
How much I’ve stretched and learned.

But my heart is still a little sad.
Jimmy got a stake calling to be an assistant Stake Clerk.
We had meetings that conflicted on Sundays & Tuesdays.
The stake asked that I be released.
And it is good.
But it is hard.
I keep thinking of all that I need to do for my calling …
someone just had a baby … the sisters who are struggling that I’ve visted…
visiting teaching changes … etc.
But it is not my stewardship or responsibility any more.
What will I do with myself?

Ok – so really…
on Sunday night after I met with the new president for 3 hours,
I felt so much lighter.
I felt so much HOPE for my life …
to organize my home and family …
get us put back together …
hope that I might have emotional & physical energy to get in shape & be healthy.
This is good.

I’ve lost a bit of that pizazz because we have sickies here this week.
I have a kidney infection & major uti (bleh!),
Tru has a barky cough,
Max has a pink eye.
Both boys are getting over an unknown 8 hour fever.
‘Liza is teething & isn’t sleeping through the night lately.

But …

because Christ Lifts Us Up!

We are so blessed in so many ways…
THIS I KNOW.
I can look back on the last year
and wonder how we kept going.
I KNOW that Heavenly Father strengthened us…
every single day.

The other day during fall break we were reviewing the scriptures we had memorized.
We came across:
T i t L w a t h;
a l n u t o u.
I a t w a h,
a h s d t p.

Huh? We hadn’t done that one in a while.
So we looked it up.

Remember when I knew change was brewing…
This was the change.
I’ve known since Sept. 5,
Anyhoo…

There’s the update.
I have oodles of lessoned learned that I need to journal from my experience as president.

THIS I also KNOW…
When we do our best to fulfill our callings,
the Lord magnifies our efforts,
and tends to make up the difference.
I was never able to do everything on a given day,
but I was able to do a little here and there…
a little laundry… a few dishes…
a few r.s. phone calls (hiding in the pantry)…
a few visits… a bit of mourning with those that mourn…
tucking in barlings… enjoying funny little people…
a bit of rejoicing with those who rejoice…
snuggling little tots… watching Eliza grow up…
a few meetings (or a lot of meetings – according to the kids)…
scrubbing toilets (ok – only occasionally)…
lots of tears… but a heart full of love.

April Clark says:

October 19, 2012 at 8:30 AM

Wow what a surprise. I love telling people about this girl I know was called to be the Relief Society president when her 5th baby was just a couple months old. Seriously? Out of control feeling I would feel- but it just means how much the Lord really does trust you with his daughters. You were obviously needed for that short little time for some unknown reason- I can only imagine how powerful and humble you must have been in that position.

Ahhh, now you can sort of relax on Sunday and just breathe a sigh of relief that you don’t have any huge responsibilities for the moment. I am sure you loved your sisters dearly after serving them so much- probably hard for a little bit to say goodbye to so much…but that feeling goes away I hear :)

Shauna says:

October 19, 2012 at 8:50 AM

Congratulations on a job well done! And speedy recovery wishes for all the little ailments! You are a hero. Love you!

alison says:

October 22, 2012 at 8:37 PM

Heath, you’re amazing! I’ve thought of you a lot the last few days. I would love to hear about all your lessons learned during your days of serving your Relief Society sisters. I know you made a difference in their lives and blessed many through your tears, prayers, and friendship. I love you dear friend!