Grizzly Bear Mama
Generally I’m a mild mother when it comes to communicating with the school about my children’s education. We’ve had teachers we didn’t love, but we helped our children learn from that experience and move on. It teaches them a lot about dealing with stuff and relationships in life.
But this week… somehow I turned into this Grizzly Bear Mama “Hear me Roar”. Wowsers.
When Hannah spent hours working on a book report poster (Hattie Big Sky — see below)… and received a 53/53, you’d think we’d be pleased. Only the teacher claimed that her report was the bare minimum so 53/53=85%. Right?! The numbers don’t add up. And these people are teaching our 5th graders?
After a nice long chat with our great principal on Tuesday, she spoke with the 5th grade team of teachers. So they sent out a slight clarification about their grading. So now, they are at least being honest and letting us know that it’s 53/64 = 85%. Only the rubric for that last 15% is undefined. Just think outside the box… go above and beyond. Subjective grading at its finest. Seriously!
One boy who did get an A drew the solar system and made it 3-D (glitter!). To me above and beyond would mean stretching yourself to read a meaningful book… share more insights from the book. But Glitter! Let’s teach our children that there is more to learning and excelling than glue & glitter.
Anyhoo… parent teacher conference the week a book report & huge state report was due = you’re asking for it teachers! I went in calm and hoped I could keep my mouth shut, but when I saw the new rubric and that it still was saying, “You do all that we’ve asked, but it won’t be good enough”, I quite let the teacher know I thought this an unacceptable way to teach 5th graders.
Homework… another topic. Hannah hasn’t time to practice piano, play, or do chores. Instead of the 50 minutes of homework, it has been more like 2-3 hours. Normal math & spelling + book report + huge state report. The teacher asked Hannah why it took her so long to do her homework. I asked if Hannah stayed on task at school during school report 30 minutes. Yes, she did. And yet, one of the brightest students still had hours of homework? Perhaps more guidance needs to be used in class.
Charles’ point was that Hard work, being responsible, experiencing failure are values and skills children need to learn in order to succeed. I get that. Love that someone recognizes that working hard as a member of a family system strengthens us more than busy-work homework. I understand that children need to experience failure as part of life. They won’t always be the star of the play! But if they work their tails off and meet requirements, they should not be treated as a failure by the teacher. I don’t care if Hannah gets straight A’s… but I do believe that if she puts forth this same effort, she will because of her diligence and brains.
Last year Hannah had the best teacher, Mrs. O’Dell. She made learning fun and the kids loved her. Her attitude was, “wow. you students are great. You are bright. You can do hard things. Let’s excel!” And the kids did. They stepped up and loved learning and doing the projects. She helped them go above and beyond in class to learn more advanced spelling, math, writing. She encouraged!
Max’s teacher ended her email with “Thanks for sharing your wonderful children with me every day!” I love her attitude. She sees the good, expects their best, and encourages.
This experience has helped me think about how I mother… do I see the best, praise, and encourage?… or do I focus too much on the negative behaviors in my children? Sometimes I do get stuck in a rut with that. A great reminder to focus on the good … positive reinforcement will help children excel much more than making them feel like they are not going to be enough.
When we meet our newborn baby for the first time, we don’t think, “Alright sonny, prove me to how Divine you are!” We teach and love that child and say, “You are a child of God. You have a great contribution to make in your life. You have a purpose and God knows you can and will do hard things to return to Him.” We help them see who they can be, and hopefully & lovingly help them improve in positive ways.
Anyhoo… I hope the 5th grade team can get it together. I even considered homeschooling (shudder!… this must be serious!). Hannah is excellent. She is one of the top students in her grade. She’s fun & bright and positive. But this year she has been so discouraged about her projects – worrying that all her work won’t be enough. Sigh…
Hopefully we can all learn from this experience and move forward together! If not, this mama bear will make her opinion known. (Who knew I had it in me!)
