Archive for category: Mothering

I didn’t hear about the tragic shootings at the elementary school in Connecticut until we got in the car to leave for our anniversary date. Oh, how sad my heart was when I thought of all of those families grieving…. about the hard things all the kids had to deal with.

I was planning on going to the school to say good-bye to Hannah and Abe since they weren’t home quite yet. I had to try and contain my tears as I hugged them good-bye.

I didn’t want to ever tell my kids about this event. I wanted to shield them from the pain. But yesterday when we were in the Salt Lake Temple, I knew we needed to talk with Hannah and Abe about it. The would hear about it from other children or at school and it is better if they hear of such things at home where they feel secure and loved.

We talked with Hannah and Abe about gospel principles and read some scriptures. We tried to explain why bad things happen – and the eternal perspective of it all. Last Sunday our bishop talked about how “We Can Do Hard Things” such as parenting in hard times. Talking to our children about essential conversations about eternal identity, strength of character, testimony, courage to stand strong to combat the wickedness of the world. These can be awkward and HARD conversations. But we must have them with our children.

Anyhooo… I hope I will remember to be a little more compassionate and tender-hearted and cherish those little spirits that are a part of our eternal family.

My kids are growing up. They are trying to find who they are and want to be. One is confident and glides through life enjoying it – though is a little dramatic and emotional. One is struggling … with friends … with confidence … with focus … with attitude. Oh, it’s hard. I’ve been so thoughtful about what my role is to help these children along in discovering their true identity – their confidence in knowing who they are as a Child of God. I feel like Elasti-Girl when she tells her children:

It’s so tricky to try and be the mom each child needs – all the time. I usually have 5 little people talking (or crying) to mom at the same time. Oh, how I hope they will be filled with the Spirit when I can’t be exactly what they need right at that moment. I came across this quote again and I hope to keep it in the forefront of my head/heart so that I will use patience and kindness when talking to my kids. I need to choose my words more carefully and remember to always build them up, even when I’m frustrated and at a loss of how to teach them.

This parenting thing is tricky business. I’m most grateful for the still, small voice that helps us know what to do. If only it were quiet enough ’round here to pay more attention to it. Working on that inner stillness!

p.s. had to note that for the first time in oh, like forever, we are having a real quiet time. Meaning, Maxwell is at preschool. Tru is not napping but is upstairs on his bed resting. Eliza is officially zonked. We’ve had the weirdest schedule over the summer and into September. Eliza takes a long nap in the morning and is awake during quiet time and then sleeps again when the kids get home – which has meant no real quiet time for mom. Oh – it’s my breathe of fresh air to regroup and have stillness.